Nearest Distant Shore: A Rising Tide Lifts All Boats

We're twenty minutes into a brand new year and I'm sipping a glass of champagne, watching the neighborhood fireworks through the window. At midnight I kissed my son and wished him and his friend a happy new year, then I went outside to toast the universe and wish on a star. Staring into the night sky, I lifted my glass and shouted "Happy New Year!"

2007 was definitely a milestone year, a difficult year in many, many respects. It was also the year that I learned how truly wonderful my friends are, how people truly do want to help, and what it means to accept that help, and I learned how love and prayers for healing will lift your boat into the rising tide until you can row it yourself again.

And rowing I am, as hard as my tired body will let me. I've had 15 chemo treatments, 3 surgeries and various procedures, countless vials of blood drawn and I've grown a new liver. After a nice little break I will start chemo again this Thursday, and the following week I have to have a stent put in to strengthen places the chemo has weakened. My lungs and liver are clear, my CEA markers are a little high, but the procedure next week should take care of that.

Most importantly, I'm alive. I lived to see another birthday, the last one in my 40s. I've watched my son grow more fearless as his confidence has grown, and in nine days he will turn nine years old. I'm managing a pretty decent coparenting arrangement with Liam's father. We are blessed to be in a warm comfortable home with enough to eat and decent clothes to wear. Our Christmas was very low-key and warm and loving, and we have the world's prettiest tree. I worry incessantly about money -- my savings are gone and I still can't work full time, though I'm trying, and walking on faith that I will continue to find what we need.

But I'm ringing in a new year, filled with hope and promises of a better tomorrow. I am looking forward to my usual de-Christmasing and scrubbing the house from top to bottom in just a few days. I'm looking forward to sunny days on the beach in spring and summer, helping to put a Democrat in the White House in the fall, and turning 50 in the winter. My gratitude for my blessings is overflowing, and I count my friends in the blogging community as one of my biggest blessings. This journey would be so much poorer without y'all along for the ride.

Happy New Year is very inadequate to convey my good wishes, but I wish you peace and serenity, love and laughter and abundance in all the days to come.

Comments

I can only wish the best New Year for you and Liam. You sound so positive and upbeat and I guess you really know the meaning of "Thankful". Keep us all posted as you are able because we all care about you. You are one Hell of a woman!
Redhead

Posted by: Redhead | January 01, 2008 at 10:58 AM

Happy 2008, Terrilynn! The world is better for your presence in it.

Posted by: Laurie | January 01, 2008 at 11:40 AM

This is my favorite post of 2008.

I love you, TL, with my whole entire heart. And I think 2008 is going to be one helluva a very good year.

xoxo

Posted by: Jennifer | January 01, 2008 at 05:19 PM

It warms my heart to read this post. Happy New Year to you Terrylynn.

Posted by: Marie | January 01, 2008 at 05:21 PM

Terrilynn, do you know how heartwarming it is to see a new post from you? Truly wonderful for me. I have prayed for you; it is great to know you are responding to the chemo and in 2008 (which must be a better year for us all) I wish you continued life, health, prosperity and serenity. Oh, and the popping up a a new post when you feel like it. Happy New Year!

Posted by: kenju | January 01, 2008 at 06:21 PM

Happy New Year Terrilynn and Liam. May 2008 bring both ordinary and extrordinary miracles to your lives!

Posted by: Lisa V | January 03, 2008 at 03:10 PM

It does my heart good to see you posting and know that you are always in my prayers. I wish you a much easier and brighter year than the last!

Posted by: javajeanelaine | January 03, 2008 at 07:07 PM

It's wonderful to hear the hope and joy in your post. I wish you and Liam a year filled with blessings, good fortune and love.

Posted by: catherine ryan | January 04, 2008 at 12:11 AM

Terrilynn, I wish you and Liam all the best in the years to come.

And I'm so very glad to see you posting again. Your tremendous strength and beautiful writing are an inspiration.

Posted by: Sandra Miller | January 04, 2008 at 11:07 AM

Happy New Year, Terrilynn. This was a beautiful, beautiful post.

Posted by: Major Bedhead | January 09, 2008 at 12:00 AM

Happy Birthday to Liam and thanks for sharing with us, Terrilynn. Gosh, you really look good considering all you have been through! Liam is such a beautiful child! He looks like you could just squeeze him to death! (And he would probably DIE if you did.) I know this year will bring you and your world on the mend. No one knows why we have these trials, but surely something good will come out of all of this for both of you. Liam is also lucky to have you as a Mom.

Posted by: redhead | January 10, 2008 at 11:06 PM

So glad to see you back! Happy New Year!

Posted by: rosemoon | January 11, 2008 at 05:10 PM

ALL MY PRAYERS AND BEST WISHES FOR A HEALTHY AND HAPPY NEW YEAR. YOU'VE COME SO FAR THIS YEAR, MAY YOU CONTINUE TO HEAL AND RECUPERATE AND GROW STRONG WITH THE LOVE OF YOUR SON AND FRIENDS!

Posted by: Loretta | January 16, 2008 at 10:12 PM